Recognition for the Right Reasons

Today, I was informed that I got a raise. Woo hoo! Although I am making much less than I was at my previous job, and this one is only part-time, I nearly cried when my boss passed the news along to me. Was it because of the money? In part, yes, but the bigger reason was because he felt I "deserved it." Really?!?

At my previous job, I saw people hired, promoted, congratulated, recognized and praised who fit the "mold" of the perfect employee - Gucci bag, check! Designer suit, check! Dinner reservations at the trendy restaurant, check! Family connections, check! What a disappointment. You were either in the right clique, or you were out.

I'll never forget the day when I re-arranged my cubicle and moved my framed diploma from one wall to another. Clearly the new placement was much more visible. Within 30 minutes, the Executive VP of the company stopped, commented about how impressive it was (as if he hadn't known this already?! He was one of the people who hired me!) and looked at me with a respect and admiration I had been striving for the entire 4 years I had worked there. Within another 30 minutes, the President and CEO of the company repeated his performance, almost to a T.

So, that's what I should have been doing? Trying to fit into a mold? All it would have taken to have them notice and take an interest in me was a few knock-off bags, a fake tan and a penchant for the "finer" things in life? Wow. I never knew a shiny frame and a fake diploma commanded such power and influence.

I learned a valuable lesson that day. Sometimes, people cannot see beyond themselves to truly recognize another person's talents and contributions. They get distracted from the quality of the work and level of determination and become fixated on the razzle dazzle. Like a moth to a flame.

I also learned that when you do work for someone who is able to recognize someone for their actual work and dedication, that you're in a better position than many. Regardless of money.

Today, I feel appreciated, recognized and valuable. And what kind of ROI (return on investment) does that give the company? An employee who will work even harder to exceed expectations, do a great job and will truly enjoy coming in to work. You can't buy people who really care. That's something I believe is earned.

Today has been a good day

It has been quite a while since I have felt like I have a measure of control over my life. There are moments here and there but for the most part it's like I'm trapped in a weird wormhole, careening out of control, without aim, purpose or self worth.

I've gained weight, been overwhelmed with crushing stress and anxiety, and I'm not the mom I want to be for my kids nor the kind of wife I would like to be for my husband. At the same time, I have also learned some valuable lessons about what really matters in life.

At nearly every family gathering I attend, I find myself tearing up and feeling an overwhelming sense of peace and gratitude for the loved ones I proudly call my family (both my birth family and my married family). I know without a doubt that if the world fell apart, we would all come together with a strength and force that few have ever seen. We would combine our drive, determination, intelligence, dedication and faith (in all its forms) and we would survive. In fact, I believe we would thrive. Perhaps that's what makes us great and what sets us apart from many others. We may not have a great deal of money collectively, but the strength of our family bonds is something that cannot be bought, traded, sold or auctioned off.

I've embraced and relied on my spirituality to get me through difficult moments, hours, days and months.

I've learned that honesty and humility won't kill you or make people turn away from you. I've learned that I enjoy working with my hands and exceeding people's expectations. I love being creative and doing new things that no one else does. I've learned that the love Trent and I share is real, true and pretty durable!

It's funny how these things are taken for granted as we go through the motions of our life.

And today I feel a renewed sense of peace that I feel is noteworthy. Today has been a good day.